Work addiction is like any other compulsion, but it usually does not have the negative connotation as say, drug addiction. In fact, being a slave to the job is praised and honored. For many, working 70 hours a week is a badge of honor, a sign of willingness to do what is necessary to get ahead. Use Donald Trump as an example, or even Ted Turner. There is a never ending need to compete and be seen as successful. It can follow you to the grave.
The problem is, the society judges us by what we do, what we have, where we live, and things we can buy. The more goodies, the more important we are seen to be. Witness people who have lived very mediocre lives and then inherit a large estate. They quickly become consumers at a high level and are thought to be successful.
Enduring pressure and putting out the energy and drive is the mantra of the workaholic. I can recall my husband working for a man who told the group when he took over his job, ‘If you’re the kind of person who isn’t willing to work as many hours as I need you, you better get another job. He was a workaholic and didn’t want to be alone so his frustrated employees had to follow the leader or hit the pavement.
Work addiction is just like any other addiction. True workaholics are on a high when they are the first person in the office and the last to leave. They expect rewards for this behavior, financial and promotions, to get their thrill. Work=self esteem and rule in this person’s life. They are worth as much as they work. So push, push, push, and get the relief of feeling ‘Finally I am a good person. Work as an addiction also is a way of escaping pain, just like the alcoholic. If you do not have to be in an unhappy situation or think about it, you can pretend you do not have to do anything about it. Ever wonder why the golf courses are full? Could it be a means of escape and denial?
Workaholics are not comfortable, relaxed, and happy outside of the work environment. Parenting and spousal duties are a chore. They take precious time away. They make the workaholic feel guilty and stuck. Work is the place to feel important, effective, and successful. Everything else is a bore. They think they are hiding their feelings but those around them sense that they are there in body only. Their personal relationships suffer. How often have you heard of the parent who has been abandoned in elderly years due to children feeling they now have no responsibility towards the parent.
Are you a workaholic? Here are signs to look for:
Is your time at work causing people you love to be upset or angry with you?
Do you promise to stop working so much, but find you cannot stop?
Do you find you cannot relax at home because you are thinking of work?
Do you break scheduled plans, travel or any other activity because work requires you?
Do you have blackberries, laptops, and cell phones, etc. everywhere you go?
Has your health been affected by your work demands?
Do you find that succcess at work becomes a stressor, driving you to do more?
Are you irritable and impatient with those who keep you from work?
Are you critical of others who do not work long and as hard as you do?
Are you upset when the work goes on without you when you are away?
If you find yourself nodding along and answering yes to several of these questions, you may be a workaholic. It’s time to look at what is really important in your life and prioritize accordingly.
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