Love can kill you, there’s no doubt about it. You are who you love. If you love the wrong person or wrong people, you’re a goner. No one can hurt or destroy us like someone we trust, someone we believed would be loyal, someone who betrayed us and made our hearts and souls jaded. Love can kill and if you love a toxic person, you had better run while you can because otherwise there may no salvation of life or happiness. Toxic love can squeeze the hope right out of you.
I like to think of those who are toxic to us as ‘dragons’ who are always with us, using every opportunity to take a ‘dump’ on us. Any time you spend with that toxic dragon is siphoning the life right out of you. Here’s what you must know. The person who is toxic to you will not change, does not want to change, and wants to keep you right where you are–stuck in a pit of misery. The Dragon wants to keep poisoning you and keep you under control. The Dragon blows fumes at you and you become smaller and smaller in your heart and soul.
Toxic people roam around freely and openly because they can. They are more in number than anyone wants to admit. They take our energy, strength, love, and our precious time on this earth. This goes on and on and slowly before we know it, our lives are used up,our hearts and souls are ruined, and the dragon keeps on going like the energizer bunny.
This is a truth that each of us needs to understand. Some people cannot be around each other, be together, or even mix without harmful effects. There are definite mismatches that were never meant to be and certainly were not meant to continue.
Coming to grips with the fact that you must leave a toxic relationship is one of the most difficult things you will ever do. It is a life changing experience and you have to have the strength to do it.
Get Prepared To Slay The Dragon By Doing These Simple tasks:
Sit down with a friend, co worker, a neighbor, or a family member and review what is going on in the toxic relationship. You need someone who can help you put the whole situation in perspective. Unfortunately we may be so close we cannot see the forest through the trees. Maybe we have started to think all of this is our fault. (It isn’t.) Make a list of what has been going on, the things that have been said or done which have left you feeling destroyed. Talk about how that toxic person makes you feel and how so far you have felt powerless to change things.
Realize that love and pain are not one and the same. You do not have a good or healthy relationship if you feel drained, used, hurt, and humiliated by that person. If you are angry, depressed, lonely, hurt when you are with this person, it is no good. It is not love. It is simply an addicition to the toxic drug of choiceyour personal dragon.
Is there a reason you have been sticking with this relationship which has nothing to do with your feelings? Are you staying in this relationship for your friends, for your parents for your kids? This is not good. The clock is ticking, your life is slipping away. You cannot stay in a toxic relationship for the sake of anyone else. The relationship has lost it’s value if being around the person makes you feel horrible. Don’t hold onto a hot potato.
Decide if you have to make the break and then do it permanently. No trial separations, no second chances, no giving it more time. Time will only suck more energy out of you and make the dragon stronger. This is asking a lot from you because you have become somewhat used to this toxic relationship. In some ways you find yourself attracted to it, maybe for money, security, sex, etc. Sometimes you have to give up a lot to get out.
Work on your health and physical fitness. Strong body, strong mind. Work on curbing any of your habits which are hurting you, like overeating or using alcohol or drugs. Make sure you are in shape to slay the dragon before you start. The dragon will not go away easily. There may be a confrontation and you need to be strong enough to handle it.
Only you can get yourself out of the toxic relationship. Only you can slay the toxic dragon. You have given the power away to someone who has no love for you. Now is the time to take back the power and take back your life. Otherwise you may be slowly killing yourself by staying with that toxic, fire breathing dragon who is pushing you towards the grave.